Recently, I’ve noticed a rise in food fears among younger children. And helping them manage anxiety around food has become an essential part of my work. These are not just issues with picky eating, but actual food disorders.
While picky eating is common, children with conditions like Autism (ASD), Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), ARFID, OCD, or EDNOS often have a more complicated relationship with food—it’s not just about preferences, and it’s certainly not their fault. Or yours Muma for that matter!
Mum guilt can often creep in when all they eat is chicken nuggets but sometimes there's more to it than just fussy eating. Need help convincing others of this when they offer their unsolicited, well- meaning advice then watch here Don’t Let Your Child's Food Anxiety Steal Christmas!
If your child hasn’t been diagnosed with a specific food-related disorder but you suspect there’s an issue, read on to explore these conditions, how they might be affecting your child’s eating habits and how you can help.
Autism and Food
Imagine being at a dinner table where the lights are too bright, the food smells too strong, and every sound feels amplified. This is what mealtimes can feel like for some children.
Children with autism often experience sensory input, like taste and texture, differently than others. They may be hyper-sensitive or not sensitive enough, and this affects how they handle food. For example, they might struggle to sense hunger or fullness?
Often, autistic children have a small range of “safe” foods they stick to, usually carbs like bread or potatoes. Foods that look the same every time feel safer, while anything that varies in shape, colour, or texture can be unsettling. They may also insist on using certain plates or cups they associate with comfort and safety. If the food is served on these, it’s easier for them to accept it. Some children don’t like their food to touch. Even if they enjoy bread and cheese separately, they might reject a cheese sandwich if it means the two are combined. Strong preferences for textures like soft or crunchy are common, and these preferences often emerge early.
You may have noticed these challenges while weaning if they spat out lumpy foods or gagged easily. If your child is over a year old and still prefers purees or baby food, speak with your health visitor or GP. It could indicate difficulties with developing oral-motor skills, which can lead to a continued preference for smooth textures.
Children with autism have a real fear of gagging, choking, or being sick. Trying to teach your child to eat small bites or not to stuff too much in their mouth isn’t easy. They also tend to be messy eaters, spilling food down themselves. This is why often they prefer eating with their hands. They find chewing, swallowing, and using cutlery tasks difficult and may also dislike the sounds of cutlery scraping plates.
Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA)
Basic demands like eating, sleeping, or using the toilet can trigger intense anxiety for children with PDA. Rules, restrictions, commands, and even the presence of other people can make their anxiety even worse. Children with PDA may perceive any help or encouragement, such as a sticker reward chart, as an additional source of stress, which can cause increased resistance.
Reducing demands and using more permissive language helps. Instead of saying, “Eat your food,” try “Oh, look, food’s here if you’d like some!”
ARFID: Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder
ARFID (Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder) is a recognised eating disorder where children consistently avoid or restrict certain foods, leading to a very limited diet. It can be treated. The key is patience and understanding. Let family members and caregivers know what ARFID is and how they can help reduce your child’s anxiety around food. If you need any help with this take a look at this YouTube video now Don’t Let Your Child's Food Anxiety Steal Christmas!
Make sure your child feels like they have choices, and never force them to eat.
OCD: Rigid Rules and Rituals
Children with OCD often have strict rules around eating, like refusing food that has touched or isn’t prepared “just right,” such as toast that’s too brown. These rituals can be tied to fears of contamination. Unlike autism-related repetitive behaviours that provide comfort, OCD rituals are driven by anxiety and compulsions, such as hand washing to reduce fear of germs. Giving in to these rituals can worsen their anxiety, so it’s important to avoid encouraging them, as it can lead to more distress.
Pica: What It Is?
Pica is when children eat non-food items like dirt, paper, or small objects for at least a month, often signalling developmental delays or nutritional deficiencies. It can happen because they may not distinguish what food is, or they use it to get sensory input, or relieve stress. Sometimes, it’s a way to seek attention or avoid tasks. Eating these items can lead to stomach issues, poisoning, or infections. If you suspect Pica, consult a healthcare professional to check for causes like iron deficiency or emotional factors.
If you’d like to learn more about these eating disorders in children and ways in which you can help your child relieve anxiety around food, then you can find my full article When Eating is More Than Just Food: How Autism, PDA, ARFID, and OCD Affect Your Child’s Relationship with Eating, in the Winter issue of mums and tots magazine, on sale now or grab your digital version here on magzter mums and tots magazine and dive straight in.
Need more personalised support?
Mumatherapy® offers online or in person 1:1 Parent Coaching and Hypnotherapy and personalised Nutritional Meal Plans, email me [email protected] to book your free telephone Consultation.
Happy Eating, Em x
You may also be interested in How Food Can Affect Your Childs Mood
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