Well into the first month of 2022 and by now, most of our goals and resolutions set in January start to fall by the wayside, as motivation wanes and our old habits return to comfortably seduce us back to the familiar.
As busy mumpreneurs, juggling businesses and family life, it’s all too easy to start beating yourself up.
But go easy on yourself.
The fact you care enough to try and change those things in your life that need attention, and set goals, means you’re doing pretty good when it comes to moving towards your best life.
Okay you may not have lost that 2 stone yet, and maybe you never will? But look at the little changes you’ve made such as Veganuary, No beef for a week, or Dry January.
All those little things soon add up and inevitably, over time, will help you reach your goals if you keep taking baby steps and making small alterations, rather than beating yourself up and giving up completely.
It’s easy to overlook what you’ve achieved when you focus on what’s still to be done.
The joy is in doing things for fun, not things that have to be done
Be your own best friend and pat yourself on the back for each ‘To do’ you check off your list. There’s always going to be laundry in the basket so ‘done’ is always good enough.
Nothing is ever perfect. No one is ever perfect. Circumstances are never perfect.
It doesn’t have to be perfect, so praise your efforts as much as accomplishments like you would your child.
Keep going Muma, you got this!
Let me know you ‘wins’ or ‘bins’ so far this month in the comments below 🙂
At the beginning of every New Year, I sit down and plan my year ahead. I write down my dreams, desires and goals.
Then I compile a list of ‘To Do’s’ to help me achieve them, which usually motivates me to get going.
To get busy weaving my dreams into reality.
But one thing 2020 has taught me is that, even my best laid plans can go awry. Although I had big goals for last year, the most important ones I achieved were not through planning or doing but through unforeseen circumstances and just going with the flow and ‘being’.
Spending more family ‘Us Time’ present in the moment and feeling relaxed and content just doing nothing, happened naturally during lockdown.
Having time to get both of my books completed and published arose from a misfortunate Covid-19 set of circumstances, forcing me to close my childcare business for months.
Appreciating friends and family more was another side effect of being kept apart from those I loved.
And being grateful for everything I had, such as my business, my home and family became enough to make me stop and see that- I already had everything I needed and wanted in life.
So today on January the 1st 2021, as I sit in the warm glow of sweet-scented candlelight, notebook and pen in hand, ready to plan 2021, there’s only one goal on my list this year and that’s simply to enjoy each and every moment with those I love.
We all need goals to succeed in life but it’s not
just about the end result.
On the journey towards our goal, our own happiness
along the way, is more important than the end destination of achieving the goal
It’s all about the day to day process of creating
or learning that is significant. We all want to succeed in achieving our goals
to feel good, therefore feeling good is the ultimate goal.
With that in mind, here are some pointers that can help us to feel good while working towards our goals.
WORTH WHILE GOALS
We need goals that personally mean something to us.
If we have a goal to quit smoking because our partner wants us to, we are less
likely to stick at it and succeed.
TAKE SMALL STEPS
It’s good to keep the end result in mind but sometimes this can be overwhelming, especially to begin with. Break goals down into small, easy, manageable steps and work towards goals gradually.
Goals give us direction and intention in the
moment, but we can only find enthusiasm and motivation, if the steps that lead
to our goals are enjoyable and worthwhile.
Goals need to be achievable. If our ambitions are getting
us down or are too difficult and challenging, they’ll only serve to make us
feel defeated, instead of successful.
Wanting to lose weight for example, is not specific
enough. We have to decide how much weight we want to lose exactly. What’s the
ideal weight we are aiming for or clothes size we want to be?
A TIME SCALE
When exactly do you want to achieve your goal?
By July the fourth 2019 is a definite date and
better than saying, ‘Before I go on holiday’
You are more likely to achieve your goal with a
time scale set.
PROGRESS & RESULTS
By being specific about what you want and when, you can measure how you are doing.
If your goal is to lose 2 stone by July 2019 and you’ve already lost a stone by November 2018, you know you are half way there and that it’s a realistic goal that’s achievable.
Decide that today is going to be the day you start.
Set a goal and stick to it!
Then give it all you’ve got, unless of course it’s
Sometimes things change, so don’t be afraid to
change your goals if needs be.
There’s little point carrying on in pursuit of a
goal, if it’s no longer suitable, working or fulfilling us in some way.
It’s hard to recover and bounce back from failure
or challenges, if our only focus is on successfully achieving a goal.
Switching our focus to the process of learning, and
prioritising our happiness and well -being along the way, will build
Resilience comes from understanding that it’s not
failure or what goes wrong that’s the problem, it’s our own expectations and
how we deal with it, and how good we are at being able to pick ourselves back
up again and carry on.
We need to build inner strength and faith.
We may not always see how something is going to
turn out or know exactly what we have to do?
But we can still stay faithful to our goals and
Every cloud has a silver lining, if we can identify
any good that comes from seemingly negative experiences, then we will be more
inclined to learn and bounce back from them, and try again.
By keeping focused on the positive and looking for
the good in everything, we will eventually find it, and less likely to feel
helplessly beaten by negativity.
Sometimes it’s just a case of changing our
perspective, other times our behaviour.
Our actions and the way we feel, is important to
reaching our goals.
No one else can actually make us feel happy, upset
How we feel is our own responsibility.
It’s up to us to choose our response, we have the
ability to respond to others and circumstances any way we choose. When we can
take responsibility and still stay positive and upbeat when others aren’t, or
when things are not going right, we will be the master of our own emotions and
be able achieve our goals no matter what.
We are not a failure if we don’t succeed or reach
our goals, we are a success because we tried.
As Edison said about discovering a certain filament,
in inventing an electric light bulb;
‘I didn’t fail a thousand times; I found a thousand
ways that it wouldn’t work!’
Despite the many failures, he eventually found that filament, had he given up trying, we may all still be sat in the dark today?
His best teacher was failure. Keep that in mind
before you even consider giving up!
Edison was also quoted as saying;
‘Many of life’s failures are, people who didn’t
realise how close they were to success when they gave up.’
When the going gets tough remember this motto:
‘Winners never quit and quitters never win!’
It may be April already, but don’t give up on your
good goal’s guys!
Come New Year 2020, you’ll be glad you persevered.
As long as we can remember that the ultimate goal is always happiness, this will not only help us to succeed but it’ll help us to Stay Present!